No One Should be Suprised by How Disasterous Artifact's Launch has Been

No One Should be Suprised by How Disasterous Artifact's Launch has Been

so I've been watching that artifact game in the news lately because I love me a good train wreck you know boy we got one so real quick show of hands who actually thought that this was going to be a successful thing especially after it was announced to a literal groan okay you can put your hands down I can't actually see you but thank you for the participation alrighty and for the rest of you just to give you a quick crash course on what exactly this artifact thing is because I'm not paying money so I can have 30 seconds of gameplay footage artifact is a dota 2 themed card game in the vein of hearthstone except extremely complicated and extremely monetized as I mentioned earlier when it was announced at the dota 2 tournament the International it was meant was a literal universal groan from the audience in attendance and since then it's only gone downhill why would valve the creator of such games as half-life portal counter-strike and so on make a card game to rifle different kinds of games like Magic the Gathering Hearst owned whatever that Elder Scrolls game is gonna be money that's why this game is embarrassingly excessively monetized you got to pay to buy the game you got to pay to buy the packs to do a draft game you just got to pay for everything and they try to excuse it away as oh don't worry these have real money value for the cards it's like you can make that excuse just like pokemon cards and Magic the Gathering because you have a physical card that will not be instantaneously devaluated if somebody makes a new run of that card but this is not the case with games like artifact and hearthstone and surprise surprise that exact line of thought instantly proved to be right because somebody figured out a way to get the game on sale by buying the valve complete pack and that instantly devaluated all the cards that people had that they had shout out a bunch of money for and this isn't even going off the idea that it's not a very good idea to have a price of entry for your digital card game yes you can try to rationalize it away as oh that's just you buying your starter deck but any other card game online isn't gonna have you do that because you aren't actually buying a physical deck you're just getting access to something digitally and that's going to be very intimidating especially when you're already going into a saturated market that people are already getting tired of I will credit that Valve did respond quickly to the universal outrage at this pay model but they shouldn't have done this in the first place it's not a good practice to do the bad thing and then ask for forgiveness later knowing full well that the bad thing is not going to work out and if they wanted this to have any chance at success they would have made it a little easier for people to get into without having to drop an Andrew Jackson on this thing and you know what else would have made people a little more likely to get into this game if the game's rules made sense the game rules for artifact would actually be pretty funny if this wasn't real and I'm talking in more of a sense that the best way to describe the game rules for artifact is that imagine a cartoon or some sort of television show where the nerdy character plays some obscure card game and when they try to explain it the rules like it's zones out of the character because the rules are just so ridiculously complicated that's artifact like if anything this sounds like the kind of thing that like the game comes to life and they have to invoke some obscure rule to stop the monsters from being real when I first watched the game play a demonstration of artifact I was completely and hopelessly confused so conveniently enough for me it turned out they also did a rule explainer video so I went back and watched that thoroughly and then went to the artifact demonstration again and still had no idea what was going on when I was younger I did play a bit of magic the gathering in yu-gi-oh cards and later on when hearthstone came out I tried that for a bit and a good rule of thumb is you should be able to figure out how the game works after watching a couple rounds of it and artifacts fails that test miserably her stone you can just get a and play it it's super easy to get ahold of it's fast it's fun artifact is the opposite of that just going by what we can see on various twitch streams and in the official demonstration it takes a long time half the time the twenty minute clock runs all the way out I have no idea what's going on and really this doesn't need to be three boards three boards is going to be absolute murder if they ever put this on mobile unless they want to completely redesign the UI I know they're trying to go for a parallel thing between dota 2 and this card game but that just makes things needlessly complicated when you're playing three card games at once yes I know if you only had the one board people might accuse you of knocking off her stone but it's you could have really worked your game in another way perhaps this matters because a digital card games bread and butter is being quick simple and fun her stone God is good and popular as it was because well you could play it when you're sitting and waiting for a thing and a lot of popular streamers that play competitive games like League of Legends Starcraft they played her stone between matches when they were waiting for the cue and I honestly could not see anyone ever doing that with artifact even if they somehow adapt artifact to mobile I have no idea why anyone would sit there like it's probably got the same problem as command & Conquer rivals has which yes I'll eventually make that revisitation video where you even the short matches lasts too long and you can't really do them between like major things while you're waiting for something like unless you're waiting for like a three-hour render or something there's no reason to play it because it's just too long at times now if you're wondering why any of this matters it's really the whole point of nobody asks for this out of all the things people are asking for from valve and this feels overtly designed as a moneymaker first and an enjoyable game as a far-distant second if anything this is a good mineshaft canary as to how out of touch valve is and we really shouldn't consider them a game developer anymore we should consider them game publisher or no not even a game publisher we should consider them a game storefront that once a upon a time used to make their own games until they realized they could make more money selling and monetizing other people's games think about it the amount of cash that Valve pulls in just by getting their cut from everyone that puts their games on Steam which even if Epic Games is trying to shoehorn their way in right now and other platforms like GOG exist you pretty much can't survive unless you're on Steam like I can't even remember the name of that other it was something was addy that tried to compete with steam for a while and they just fell flat on their face but you get the idea valve forgot how to make games a while ago the most recent thing they did was a while back they made a little tech demo for their HTC vive and apparently according to Wikipedia they made a left for dead arcade game but that's so obscure they don't even have an article page on it if anything this is just a sign that if we see valve actually announce any of their original properties or a new property in the near future we should be very very worried I know I just wasted a bunch of both of our times talking about a game that no one really intends to play especially after that inflation kerfuffle with all the cards but it's a shame well at least they can't take away the games that they put out in the past or can they crap don't let's not test them on that whatever subscribe bye thank you all so much for watching I'd like to shout out all my patreon patrons who helped make these videos possible as well as a special shout out to my $10 tier patrons shredded paper plate otter man Jay Patterson and Mick fluffy on in the near future which you can see on the community tab of this channel and I will see you in the next video sign offs are stupid I don't know how to do them bye you were an extremely naughty boy today I'm gonna tell all the people what you did we had a building inspection today and we knew that you would cause too much trouble if we left you at home by yourself to attack those poor building supers so what did you do well you were okay when we put you in the carrier to go to mommy's work but then when we got there you lost your mind you screamed and you screamed and you screamed and you been mommy's ears ring and then on top of that you started a prison riot in the boarding area that's right once you it started freaking out you got all the other kiddies at the Animal Hospital freaking out do you have anything to say for yourself you mean inmate agitator that is not snack do not eat it it is not snack oh look at this this is the face of someone who starts prison riots even the kiddies that were all extra nice were like oh I guess we're writing now you know what you have not conquered this cage get off this I'm sitting on this now who's in control now I am

20 thoughts on “No One Should be Suprised by How Disasterous Artifact's Launch has Been”

  1. Hearthstone: a game to play while waiting for something to happen.

    Artifact: a game to play while waiting for Godot.

  2. Why people still defend this game? 2k player base lul From 60 k peak. For some online games this is dead game already

  3. Compared to any other card game, Artifact is not very difficult to pick up. I originally hated on the game for the monetization, but the game is VERY cheap, especially considering the market is devalued even more because of the huge loss of players. They also added a leveling system which gives you a good amount of card packs and arena tickets just from playing the game. You can buy essentially any cards you want even just spending $5 or $10 one time (with exception of strong board clears for blue and a single red hero, Axe). Even Axe, the most expensive card in the game, only costs $4 plus change, ($4.17 atm) and you only need one copy of him because he's a hero card. There are currently only 7 other cards that cost more than a dollar with only 2 costing more than $2 and the vast majority of cards are only 4 cents. IMO this is a huge reason to switch coming from any other card game. I have spent at least a couple hundred dollars on Hearthstone and I feel like I got so much more from spending just $10 on Artifact. The $20 'entry fee' is completely worth saving tons in the long term and saving your sanity from literally gambling with card packs.

  4. A bit late to the shit talking party. The game is good they listened to people and it will get better. They say they are invested in the long haul, so chill. Also it's 20 bucks, do you even have a job? People are treating it like it's some huge commitment. If you can't spend 20 bucks you have other things to worry about besides buying a video game.

  5. The gameplay was awesome coming from a Dota and dark souls player so I like complicated but yeah too overpriced

  6. I'm not gonna defend Artifact, it's not that great a game, but if you have such big issues getting the rules you kind of fail as a gamer.

  7. This game is not hard to understand. I get the lack of what is a good play, but come on, all the mechanics are simple.

  8. Wow looks like you just got disliked by the whole playerbase of artifact, all 50 of them. Most points are valid aside from little details. They just can't handle the reality and how their "Hearthstone-killer" is a disaster and a well earned failure. This is what happens when the little buggers at Valve think that just because they made a couple of great games a century ago, they can shit the bed and amp the greed up to eleven. Who the fuck designs a digital card game in which you need an entry fee and then you have to pay for packs and cards. Just before everyone was sure this crap was going to the bin, i checked the prices of the cards and saw this red dwarf called Axe or something for $40. What the shit homes this isn't a F2P game.

  9. Love Artifact! After trying, was an easy decision to drop HS after 4 years of playing. No regrets. And yes, after purchase i went f2p. Enjoy draft mode so no need to collect cards. Great, rewarding in depth game.

  10. I can imagine your saucy boy doing like Al Pacino meowing Attica thanks to your kitty riot story. As for the Artifact thing…I was mostly engrossed in your Solitaire gameplay that some of the details I think slipped by, but kind of got the jist of things. I now just want to go out and purchase a pack of cards to play for myself, though I believe I have one lying around somewhere. Just need to take out the Jokers. (I kind of feel like Digital Cardgames aren't interesting enough to me, so Hearthstone nor this one did interest me as much, though Hearthstone did seem fun. I'm more a fan of physical media anyways.)

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